Oh My Goodness! A New Post!

June 2nd was the last time I posted here. Over four months ago. Wow. To be honest, I kind of forgot all about infectious joy. It's been hard enough finding the time update Kieran's blog once a month.

But I went on one of my lame rants the other day, and it reminded me that I do have a forum for such rants! Where people don't judge (okay, let's just pretend), and I can say whatever I want (kind of)! Dur.

The rant itself was stupid (Why am I constantly seeing commercials for dark chocolate Reese's peanut butter cups but have yet to see them available ANYWHERE!), but I realized how much I've missed blabbing to you, my peeps of the interweb.

Obviously with a soon to be 7 month old (on SUNDAY! Why The Face!), my life has been a juggling act. Now that he is in daycare full time, though, I actually have a tiny bit of time to myself. Which I didn't realize was so important. My son -- our little family -- is my life now. How could I not want to spend every minute with him. I find myself missing him while I'm at work, knowing that smiling face will always make me forget how stressful my day was.

But let me tell you, being able to run to Target at lunch without a stroller, Ergo baby, or car seat is kind of amazing. Like, the highlight of my day. Grocery shopping -- almost too good to be true.

So it's taken almost 7 months, but we're in a routine now and have pretty much figured this whole baby raising thing out (I just laughed out loud as I typed that). The first three month were rough. Not awful, just rough. If we knew then what we know now, we probably would have done a few things differently, like, accept help and not insist on taking care of the baby by ourselves. So ya, having someone watch Keiran for 7 hours a day is a huge help. Balance is key. We all need family time, work time (debatable), and "me" time. It's so nice to... breath.

But the Johnson household wouldn't be complete without some kind of life changing thing going on. That's just so not us. Thus our decision to remodel our kitchen. By ourselves. (Okay, not really by ourselves since Brother will be doing most of the work, but we're not paying anyone we can yell at. Only each other.) So, taking advantage of Grandpa and Grandma visiting and being able to watch the baby, we began demo on Sunday... and life is crazy again! Hooray!

Kieran could care less, thank goodness, even taking an hour and a half nap through Daddy taking a crow bar to the counter tile. Mommy is slightly stressed, though. Being in a house of chaos and no stove kind of makes me break out in a rash. But it's temporary, right? The goal is to get it done by Thanksgiving. I mean, our kitchen is the size of a walk-in closet. This can be done, right? Or are we completely delusional?

Anywho, I'm back and can't wait to share with you how the kitchen remodel goes. I promise to post pics of the progress, and to give public praise to my brother, who we are the mercy of for the next few months. (Insert eyelash batting and big smiles here.)

Oh, and if someone can tell me where I can get those dark chocolate peanut butter cups, I'd be forever grateful.

Happy Birthday to Tripple, and Some Catch Up

Sorry friends of the interwebs -- I didn't post at all last week. My goal is to at least post once a week, and I would really love to post two or three times. So shame on me for slacking.

Last week was my last week of the Fall semester at Academy of Art, as was it the last week of one of Trip's graduate courses. Work has been project after project, and Trip was wrapping things up before his 2-week holiday break (man am I in the wrong profession!). So needless to say there has been some serious cramming going on. Good thing is that we really didn't do any Christmas shopping this year, so I've been relieved of that annual stress-fest. For the past few years, my family has done the Secret Santa thing, but this year I was inspired by a wonderfully heartwarming story I saw on the news about a company that decided that, because the food banks are so low this year, they would donate their $4500 holiday party budget to a food bank. So instead of drawing names, my family agreed to donate to a charity of our choice. Trip and I did the Second Harvest Food Bank and the Humane Society of Silicon Valley. Christmas shopping -- CHECK! Now next year I realize will be quite different, as our son's first Christmas is sure to be an extravaganza (to say the least). But let me tell you, I have definitely enjoyed being mellow this year.

Speaking of the peanut (or English cucumber, as BabyCenter claims a 26 week baby is the same size as), everything seems to be going along smoothly. We have our 6 month appointment this Wednesday (6 months?!?), so I'll be sure to give an update, with new belly pics. I swear, the belly (among other things...) has been growing on a daily basis. As has my appetite, so go figure. At this visit our OB said she would schedule another ultrasound, just to make sure my placenta has moved up. I'm so looking forward to getting another peek at the little guy!

It was Tripple's birthday yesterday, and we had a really nice dinner at our favorite vegetarian restaurant, with a few of our favorite people. My birthday gift to him was driving him and Adam downtown to see a hip hop show on Friday, then picking them up at 1:30A. I think that wins me some Wife of the Year awards, don't you? I was a trooper again on Saturday night, when we went to a friend's party, where we stayed until after 1AM. I figure I better let Trip have some fun before it's all about the baby. Plus he deserves a little R&R after a hard first semester at work, some pretty demanding graduate school courses, and all the extra works he's had to pick up around the house (painting, kitty litter duty, cleaning the kitchen and bathrooms, carrying things up and down the stairs for me, and cooking dinner most nights -- yup, he's a keeper).

Okay, I've rambled enough... I'll try to post soon after my appointment on Wednesday -- Christmas Eve!

Glucola and Truffles.

I had my 1-Hour glucose test this morning, for gestational diabetes (a standard test for pregnant women between 25 and 28 weeks). I knew the glucola was not going to be tasty -- I can't even drink a Coke because it is too sugary for me -- so this was a bit of a challenge. I had fruit punch flavor, which actually wasn't too bad, as long as I drank it fast (you have to drink it within 5 minutes anyway), and didn't think about it.

I drank it in the car on my way to the lab, so still had half an hour to kill before they could draw blood. I was playing solitaire on my iPhone when the nausea hit me. I was a little unprepared for that. Trip warned me this morning that it would probably make me feel sick, but I didn't give it much thought. Ugh... sitting there for half an hour trying not to get sick was no fun at all.

So they called me exactly 30 minutes later to draw blood. I had a younger technician, who was very sweet and asked me if I had a fear of needles. I told her no, I just felt a little queasy. "Oh, that's why you look a little pale." No, it's December and I'm half British. I am pale. Thanks for pointing that out.

While she was checking both my arms and deciding on a vein, there was an elderly couple in the chair next to me. The wife was the one giving blood, and she was clearly not happy about it. She literally had both her hands over her eyes as her husband wheeled her in, and it took two technicians to calm her down. As soon as they pricked her she yelled, "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW, NOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW," at the top of her lungs. No joke. Talk about an uncomfortable moment -- for her, and the other five of us sitting there about to go through the same thing.

Okay, focus on the technician.... She's sweet, she knows what she's doing. After checking each arm twice, she decided on the arm and vein she was going to attack, pricked me, and started filling the vials. As I was intently focused on her, I noticed she had a bump under her lap coat.

ME: "Oh, I just noticed you're pregnant, too. Congratulations."

TECHNICIAN: "Thanks!"

ME: "How far along are you?"

TECHNICIAN: "I'm seven months."

ME: "Oh wow, you look great!"

TECHNICIAN: "Thanks! Ya, I noticed how much bigger you are than me, and your not even six months yet, right? I mean, you're all belly. But it's so big already."

Wow, she is full of compliments, isn't she? Okay, first off, "it" is my son, so back off woman. Second, I'm proud of my big beautiful belly. It proves to all those haters that you can give birth to a healthy baby without meat. He's obviously doing just fine with tofu and beans, thank you very much.

So after calling Tripple and yelling at him for impregnating me with a freak of nature (kidding, of course. I just had to tell him that story), I went home, made myself a yogurt and flaxseed smoothie, followed by some truffles. To which my son thanked me by apparently doing cartwheels.

I Love Me Some Big Glass Of Half Full

"Joy, where have you been?" you may be asking.

Well, with only six classes left at Academy of Art, I decided to tackle two of them this summer. Which is pretty crazy. What is normally a 16 week course is condensed into 8 weeks. Which means two assignments due a week. And being that one of my courses is Motion Graphics 2 (basically creating cool motion graphics in AfterEffects), equals the pretty crazy part. Actually, make that very crazy.

Add to that that the BlogHer annual conference is July 18-20 (1000 attendees; sponsors such as GM, Intuit, and TNT, to name a few; and a party at Macy's in Union Square) and well, you have me working pretty much non-stop.

Again, very crazy.

The last few weeks have definitely been a good lesson in time management. I'm trying very had to balance work and school with, well, a life. I guess this is always an issue for the working American. We live in a culture that seems to get off on burning the candle at both ends. When did this cultural shift happen? Or is that what this nation has always been about?

I guess I am partly to blame for the craziness. Had I not decided to become a rave bunny in the 90s, I would have finished my undergrad at Santa Clara in my early 20s. But when I start to think about what my life would have been, my head starts to spin. How could I even know. How could I even make a guess. It's one of those Sliding Doors kinda things. I may not have ever found out that I wanted to do design; I may have never met my husband; I may have never experienced all the bizarre and wonderful things that have made me who I am today.

So, in my 30s, and after a kick-ass winding road, I'm here working my ass off.

With a little life mixed in every chance I get.

Reason #386 Why I Love My Husband

Trip and I have been blessed with hummingbird visitors year round, mainly because they love our sugary-sweet hummingbird feeder concoction (and by "our" I mean Trip's). We've been talking for some time about getting a birdhouse, in hopes to keep them as permanent residents. So I was thrilled when I received an email from Design Within Reach today advertising a kick-ass birdhouse, and quickly forwarded it on to Trip. Our exchange:

ME: Oh my God I want it! $95, though.... :(

Close up of email

TRIP: and it makes a great home for tits! :)

ME: [laughing hysterically] you, sir, are HIL-AR-IOUS.

(End scene)

Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch
Who watches over you
Make a little birdhouse in your soul
Not to put too fine a point on it
Say I'm the only bee in your bonnet
Make a little birdhouse in your soul

-They Might Be Giants

Today's Small Step: Forgive and Forget.

A few months ago I subscribed to the newsletter of one of my favorite Food Network stars, Ellie Krieger. She hosts a wonderful show called Healthy Living with Ellie Krieger, where she often cooks vegetarian dishes (although not entirely, she is the best option for a vegetarian that loves cooking shows).

The focus of the newsletter is mainly cooking and eating healthy, but she also writes about living a healthy life in general. This recent issue really resonated with me, so I thought I would pass it on.

The poet Alexander Pope said: "To err is human, to forgive divine." Medical research has shown that forgiveness is good for the heart as well as the soul. One study found that when people dwelled on slights from their past, their blood pressure, heart rate, and muscle tension all increased, indicating that their bodies were physically stressed when they were in an unforgiving state. Harboring a grudge or resentment against someone or something can only have a negative effect on your health. Forgiving someone can release this negative energy and positively affect how you feel. Today, I'd like you to perform an exercise in forgiveness.

Forgiving someone when he or she has hurt you can be extremely difficult. But true forgiveness can set the stage for a deeper relationship, help prevent disagreements about inconsequential things, and improve your health.

Many people find that writing a letter to the person who hurt them is helpful. So today, get out all your feelings and frustrations on paper. Pretend you're facing the person who hurt you, and tell him or her how you feel. Then rip the letter into tiny pieces or burn it to symbolize that you are putting the incident behind you permanently. (Alternatively, you can try talking to someone close to you about what happened — this may allow you to vent and gain perspective.) Then make a conscious effort to let the incident go — don't keep bringing it up. Dwelling on it, especially with the person you've forgiven, may prevent you from really forgiving and moving on.

My weekend, by Joy Johnson.

Hola amigos y amigas! Feliz Cinco de Mayo!

I will be celebrating at my brother's casa tonight. Well, not so much celebrating Cinco de Mayo as frantically trying to get my last Flash project done. I'm doing a site on the illustrious music of Adam12, and not only need help getting his music up there, but pretty much creating the entire site. As my beloved husband joked last night, "Who Joy, wait until the last minute to do her homework? Nooooo." I then hit him in the face and continued to lie on the couch for my marathon tv watching sesh.

Which, by the way, was buckets of awesomeness. I can't remember the last time I wasted an entire weekend on the couch. The body needed some big time rejuvenation, ya'll. We watched pretty much everything on our DVR, and two movies. One of which I can't recommend enough - Gone Baby Gone. Not only is Casey Affleck my new stalker crush (dark hair and light eyes... <sigh>), he may very well be in my top five of actors. I was really really impressed. Kudos to both him, for his acting skills, and his big brother Ben, for his directing skills. Definitely rent this movie if you have yet to see it.

The other movie we saw was Sweeney Todd, starring another of my top fives, Johnny Depp. I have to say, the movie was a lot more gory than I anticipated. I mean, I knew the story, but dang that was some blood. But of course Johnny (yes, we're on a first name basis) is absolute genius in everything he is in, so I also enjoyed this film. I was pleasantly surprised at how good his voice was. (Side note - yes, this is a musical. But it is also Tim Burton, so give it a chance if you are not a fan of musicals. Or just sing Nightmare Before Christmas songs throughout, as Trip did).

I had a double dose of Johnny this weekend, as couldn't sleep on Saturday night (a possible side effect of too much lying on the couch all day) and channel surfed upon Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. I think it was the first time I saw the film sober. Still just as freaky, but not nearly as affecting as it was the first time I saw it. Fascinating nonetheless (although I do admit, probably not the best movie to watch at 2AM. I had some craaaaazy dreams that night).

Oh, I should mention that my fabu weekend started out on Friday with girls night out (two weekends in a row! this time, much much much less alcohol involved) to see Duran Duran. Holy crap they were good. Simon's voice was amazing, and they played pretty much every song I wanted to hear. I can't believe it took until 2008 to see them, but well worth the wait. My sister and I danced the entire concert! Do do do do do do! Do do do do do do! Ah. Fun times.

So to recap: Gone Baby Gone is a must see; Casey Affleck is my new boyfriend; Johnny Depp can sing, and remains my other boyfriend; Duran Duran still rule the world, twenty years later; and there really is no need to leave the house if you have a television (with DVR of course - duh), Dagoba 87% organic dark chocolate, Diet V8 Splash, and a husband who rubs your neck because it hurts from laying on the couch watching tv for seven hours straight.

It's Been Awhile.

Hi folks. I know it's been awhile. Between BlogHer Business, Academy of Art, revamping my website, following the primaries, bridal showers, birthdays, American Idol, Top Chef and spring cleaning, I've been a bit overwhelmed. Unfortunately since my salary, grades, water cooler gossip or marriage don't depend on it., my blog is the first thing to neglect. So my apologies to those few dedicated readers!

Wishing you all beautiful spring time weather!

(Of Course)

Trip was off work on Monday, which meant I had the honor of driving our Accord. I rarely get to drive this car, so always look forward to the much cushier ride than our Ford Escape. Don't get me wrong, that Escape is a great little SUV. Although it has been running a bit weird lately...

So ummm, yeah. I guess "weird" means the transmission is shot. Trip was treating himself to a rare Breakfast Jack (no meat!) when the Escape would not drive out of the drive-through. The engine was on, just no power when he tried to accelerate. He got a few blocks from our house when it just would not accelerate. At all.

Oddly enough, just a few days earlier we received an upgrade offer from AAA for our roadside assistance, as we only have the basic package. So rather than pay $10 a mile over the only 5 mile towing our current membership gives us, I went online and upgraded to the 100 mile tow membership. Which you can't use same day (of course). Urg! So Tripple took Tuesday off to deal with getting the car towed to Ford.

Okay, so one car for two people. Not good. Oh wait! My sister keeps her car at my brothers! Hurray! I can use that while the Escape is in the shop. Except the battery is dead (of course). So Tripple called my brother to see if he knew which size battery my sister's car needed, except he couldn't talk cause he had JUST BEEN PULLED OVER (of course).

Seriously, who pissed off the car Gods?

(Is it the whole disbelief in the math miracle thing? Cause if so, I would like to publicly declare my faith. Did you hear that people of the math miracle??? I believe you!!!!!!!!)

Happy Valentines Day!

I know some view it is a Hallmark holiday, and that you should show your love for those close to you everyday. But in this fast-paced world of war, disasters and political craziness, its kind of nice to have a day where everything is all about love.

In the words of the great John, Paul, George and Ringo:

All you need is love.
All you need is love.
All you need is love, love.
Love is all you need.

And what would elementary school be without it? You know you loved getting those cheap little valentines and heart candies.

Sustainable Love Makin'

For all you eco-conscious lovers out there, TreeHugger has put together a really cute Valentine's Day Gift Guide. My favorite (PG-rated) tip? Make your own Valentine's card. I know Trip would appreciate that since he yelled at me and called me a hypocrite for sending store-bought Christmas cards this past year (I hate it when he's right).

They also have the How to Green Your Sex Life (Warning: there are some photos of um...toys. So either scroll really fast past them if you're at work, or take a look at home.). It's actually got some interesting tips and statistics. Like this fascinating one:

Since days of yore, lovers have turned to natural herbs and special foods to find stimulation, endurance, and sexual health. While we can’t vouch for any of these, and all supplements should be taken with caution and/or professional advise, it is rumored that herbs like ginseng, kava kava root, damiana leaves, kelp, tribulus, ginko biloba, rhodiola rosea, and of course horny goat weed can help stoke the flames of passion—even more so if certified organic.

Horny goat weed? Who names this stuff? "Ginseng, kava kava root, damiana leaves, kelp, tribulus, ginko biloba, rhodiola rosea, and of course horny goat weed". Love it.

2 Hour Commute Bad. Sunny Skies Good.

I started back at school this week, which is why I haven't blogged since last Friday. Trying to get back into the whole balancing work-school-commute thing.

But I now work from home on Wednesdays as well as Fridays (YAAAAY!), and it couldn't have come at a better time. My two hour drive home last night due to the tanker trailer gas spill in Redwood City was awesome. It rained the entire time and my bum hurt by the time I got home.

But I'm in a much better mood today, mainly due to this much prettier view from my home office window:

Hooray for blue skies and green hills! Purdy!

Merry F'n Christmas

I'm trying really hard to stay in the holiday spirit. But there are so many a-holes in my universe that it makes it very difficult.

After a wonderful date night Saturday (the Cirque du Soleil show Kooza, enjoying the lights at Union Square, then dinner at Millennium), Mr. Johnson and I woke up Sunday ready to tackle a long list of to-do's. We spent the morning cleaning the house, did our Winter cleaning of the closet, then went out to run our errands.

First stop was Crossroads Trading Co., where we brought in FOUR bags of clothes and accessories. There was a line when we got there, so we looked around the store. We knew some of the stuff we brought in wouldn't be purchased, but once we started looking around, we knew quite a few would.

Looking around... looking around...Oh my gosh, I kid you not... LA GEARS. And not just any, but HIGH TOP LA GEARS. Okay, now I know they will be taking a bunch of our stuff.

So then it was our turn and the girl starts going through our stuff. Another employee - who hopefully was on her break - was trying on clothes and kept coming behind the register for her co-workers approval, which kind of bugged. A few minutes go by, then she calls me up. Did she really have time to go through all FOUR bags?

"Hi. I bought 2 of your items, for a total of $7.18."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Ya, those were the only things we'll be buying."

"Okay, I know I had some Old Navy stuff in there, but what about the Betsey Johnson dress, the four Urban Outfitters jackets, the Chanel sunglasses, or the Dior scarf? Or the polo shirts that had never been worn?"

"Ya, they weren't really the quality we look for."

But dirty-ass neon-pink high top LA Gears from 1991 are? I'm so confused. And why did I feel like this twenty year old was judging my fashion sense? My handbag cost more than her rent!

But I'm not vain like that (ya I am). We were offended for about 5 minutes, and figured we'd probably benefit more from the Goodwill tax write-off anyway. I'm sure there's some kind of science to having your clothes purchased there (probably should have separated out the Goodwill stuff), but I just don't have the time for that. I barely got around to cleaning out my closet - now I have to go through and determine what some wanna-be hipster thinks other wanna-be hipsters would want to buy? Not happening.

So we took our $7.18 and went to our next stop - Cost Plus.

We had to go to Cost Plus because a few weeks early I had bought some wine glasses, and the top of one of them looked like some kind of crazy weapon. Meaning it was totally jagged and you could definitely hurt yourself with it.

While Mr. Johnson looked for the glasses, I walked up to the register just as the salesperson was putting up her "Closed" sign. To which she looks at me and says, "I guess I'll help you first". Off to a great start. So I told her the deal, showed her the glass, and she told me to just go grab one out of another box and replace it with the lip-cutting one, and that they'll just give the next person that buys it a discount.

Ummm okay.

So I go and find another box (where the heck is my husband?) and go to replace the glass. But then I start having these visions of some grandma excited to take her first sip of Chablis, and as she puts it to her mouth she cuts her lip open, blood starts gushing out all over the place, and she has to spend the rest of the night in the emergency room.

Yeah, I can't do this.

I bring the deadly glass and the new box of glasses up to another register, at which point Mr. Johnson joins me. I tell the new sales person the deal. And she says, "Oh ya, these aren't the hand blown ones, they're factory made, so you'll have some defects."

Nice. For the second time today my purchases are questioned by some twenty-something. Don't judge me bitch. We have a mortgage and student loans.

"Well someone could seriously hurt themselves on this defect," Mr. Johnson sternly says.

"Oh yeah, you're right. I'll put this in the damages." Oh, so she'll listen to him. But then she wrote "Scary Broken Glasses" on the box and that made me smile. You have redeemed yourself.

Off to OSH, to buy a carpet cleaner. We're merrily on our way, over the fashion judgments of Crossroads and the near grandma-lip-cutting at Cost Plus.

I'm feeling the Christmas spirit again; I've got $7.18 burning a hole in my pocket. Things are good. I turn the radio to the holiday station.

<singing>
"Oh the weather outside is frightful..."

We're first in line at a stop light. I look over and see a panhandler holding a sign:

MONEY.
ARM.
ANY THINY WILL HELP.

Me: "Wait. What does that guys sign say?"
Husband: "I think he's trying to be clever. He only has one arm."

Now, usually I try to avoid any indication that I acknowledge a panhandlers presence. But I was so confused by this guys sign, I had to make sure I was reading it right. And I was. But it was too late.

He saw me looking.

So he starts to do a little dance with his sign, and we pretend we see something interesting on the other side of the road. You know, the "look over there!" routine.

We were not to be let off so easily. He starts to walk up to the car.

"I know you know how to read mother f***ing english."

Oh. No. He. Didn't.

Yes, yes I do know how to read "mother f***ing english", kind sir. But last time I checked "thiny" was not part of the english language.

<sigh>

So there you have it folks, a day full of Christmas cheer.

Epilogue

This story does have a happy (in somewhat roundabout way) ending.

Mr. Johnson received an email today from one of his colleagues that a friend suffered an apartment fire over the weekend. They unfortunately didn't have renters insurance, and 60% of their belongings were lost. As the fire happened near their closet, 90% of their clothes were lost.

The husband happens to wear the exact same size as mine. And the wife, although of normal size thus not fitting into any of my pigmy-sized clothes, will be pimping some Chanel sunglasses and Dior scarfs.

Thanksgiving is for Lovahs.

Well, Thanksgiving is over, and obviously from my lack of posts, I've been quite busy. So thought I would bring ya'll up to date!

First, Mom & Daddy came on Wednesday. Mom and I went for a hike, and came back to find Daddy nugglin' with the grandkids.

Then we had sushi for dinner. Daddy recognized that the server was Korean and started spittin' some Korea geography knowledge (No, my dad isn't Korean. He just knows everything about everything). He must have made an impression, as the husband and Daddy got some Kirins on the house. Not that this surprised me. Things like that happen to Daddy all the time.

Next day, Thanksgiving at Sissy and Keith's in Oakland.

First I made Tristan pose for me.

Renee made super yummy apps. Yum. Yum. YUM!

Keith took pictures. I took pictures of Keith taking pictures.

And Brother got kisses from Tristan.

Sissy did a Martha-riffic job of setting the table.

And here it is folks - the piece de resistance. Our first Tofurky!

Isn't it gorgeous??

Well it smelled like ass and tasted like nothing. Neither of us really cared for turkey when we were meateaters, so it was kinda destined for failure. Oh well. We tried. Next year just straight "tofu" minus the "rky". Thank goodness we had lots of these:

But everything else was wonderful, and I ate waaay too much. Dur.

So then the sun started to set, and made some bitchin shadows on the wall. Keith was jealous he didn't have his camera close by (and apparently walking up a flight of stairs is impossible after a Thanksgiving binge).

Game time! YAAAAAAAAAAAHTZEEEEEEEEEE!

Ahhhhhhh yaaaaaa. That was me biotches.

How my sister-in-law slept while we played Yahtzee I'll never know. Girlfriend was tired (or maybe drunk, but we'll just say she was tired).

And then Marie Claire proclaimed it was time for all of us to leave. "Out thee minions!"

To quote the great Ice Cube, "I gotta say it was a good day."

Friday was more eating and drinking and a 6 hour marathon of Rock Band. Papa Bear - AKA me (on vocals and bass), Mr. Johnson (on lead), Brother (on vocals and drums), Sissy (on vocals and bass) - made their first appearance in Campbell and rocked it. Keep an eye out. We're going to make it BIG. In our imaginary Rock Band world.

And then it was game night at our house Saturday night. Fun times. Lots more drinking and eating. Brother and I put together a puzzle of the Biltmore Estate - one of our NC summer vacation stops. Cat was not helping.

Mr. Johnson, Miguel, Chris, Steve, Amii, Nay, Jackson and Sarah all played Yahtzee. And apparently doodled.

Sunday was laying on the couch recovering. All day. It rocked.

And now here I am back to work and blah blah blahdiddy blah. Sad.

Amen.

"If you want to be happy, be."

-Lee Tolstoy

Absence makes the heart grow fonder. And wish you didn't have to take out the garbage.

I have always considered myself a feminist. I have always thought a woman should NEVER depend on a man.

Well it's been about nine days now since my beloved husband has been out of town, and it made me (sadly) realize how much I do depend on a man. <sigh>.

So with him leaving, naturally I was left with a to-do list. We don't have a set list of chores, but over the years we have kind of fallen into responsibilities. I pay the bills, get and sort the mail, plan our meals and make the grocery lists. He takes out the garbage, cleans the cars, maintains the fish tank. And then we have our shared duties - feeding the cats (this tends to be more him than me), cleaning the litter (this tends to be more him than me), watering the plants (this tends to be more him than me), and of course cleaning (this tends to be more him than me).

Okay, so now I have to all all those things?

Oops. I forgot to feed the fish one day, on their every other day schedule. What do I do? Do I feed today and start a new cycle?

Do I have to pull the car out before I put the garbage cans out, or is there enough room?

And then there was the issue of moving heavy things. We had the deck redone and all of our planters and furniture need to be put back in place. I'll need help for this one. Hey - I am just a little bit of a thing after all. (Thanks Adam and Amii!)

So here I am, nine days later, the night before he comes home. I can't wait. CAN'T WAIT! I've cleaned the house. Put out the garbage cans twice. Fed the fish. Did all the laundry. Watered the plants. Paid the bills. Moved the outdoor furniture around (wasn't quite right). I even changed the battery in the fire alarm.

So maybe I'm not a sad excuse of a feminist. Just tiny and lazy with the memory of a fish.

And excited to not have to take the garbage out anymore. <smile>.

Some Friday Enlightenment.

"Live your life as though your every act were to become a universal law."
- Immanuel Kant

I repeat, will the real Amy Winehouse please stand up?

Halloween used to be so much fun. Seeing all fun costumes, the candy, haunted houses, the candy, pumpkin patches, the candy. Ah! What revelry!

Now it just stresses me out. I start thinking weeks in advance, "what to be. what to be?!?!" Of course I don't start actually doing anything until about four hours before I'm supposed to be at a party. Although this year I did put some thought into my costume ahead of time, and even tried to start piecing it together about two weeks before. I found the perfect wig at about ten different websites - all of whom were sold out. So either Elvira is making a comeback in a serious way (stranger things have happened I suppose), or EVERYONE else had the brilliant idea of dressing up as the hot mess that is Amy Winehouse.

Uh oh. Perhaps my ingenious idea was not as ingenious as first thought. I mean, when you really think about it, its not particularly creative. Its pretty much stealing her costume idea (lets all pretend she doesn't really dress like that and everyday is Halloween in her messed up world). Is this the lamest idea coming from someone who considers herself a creative person? Ugh. Now I'm as depressed as Amy Winehouse. I need wine.

But not giving up (or maybe just too lazy to think of something else. ya probably that.), I decided to run with the idea, and ended up combing two wigs from Halloweens past (shout out to Amii for the help). In fact, most of the costume was recycled goods (I'm even green on Halloween! Hey that rhymed!) The only real purchase was the fake tattoos, which were actually pretty cool. I've always wanted an excuse to have boobies on my arms.

The tank top, bra, mini skirt and platform shoes were all mine. I'm a whore. :(

So ladies and gentlemen, without further ado (thats a weird word)... I give you... Amy Winehouse!
(or "The Asian Amy Winehouse" as my whitey white white husband so nicely referred to me)

So there it is. Me and eight thousand other Amy Winehouses.

Oh, did I mention someone at the party thought I was Cher? Why is that the most hilarious thing EVER?

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OCTOBER 2008 UPDATE: I've had thousands of hits to this post in the last few weeks, as I'm sure Amy Winehouse will be a popular costume choice again this year.  I've also had a lot of people emailing me asking how I put my costume together, so I wrote a new post with all the deets. Good luck and Happy Halloween!

It was inevitable wasn't it?

1. I work for a company called BlogHer, so I kinda felt left out.


2. I have insomnia, so this gives me something else to do rather than watch late night marathons of Rob & Big (don't get me wrong I love this show, but I've seen every episode a ba-gillion times).


3. My family is funny so I know they will post comments that are much more entertaining than my own.


4. Between working full-time (hour commute each way - yay!), going to art school, and maintaining a happy marriage, well why wouldn't I? Duh.


5. I like to pass on helpful, interesting information.

Speaking of which, my History of Aesthetics instructor included this quote from the great Socrates in a recent lecture:

There is only one good, knowledge, and one evil, ignorance.

Oh word.